Garda stations aren’t known for their tourist appeal, and these hilarious Google reviews of police and Garda stations around Ireland ensure that won’t change any time soon.
It is probably fair to say that the vast majority of people seldom write a Google review, although they secretly relish in the fact that first-hand reviews exist online written by others.
Whether we want to admit it or not: we base a lot of our plans on the experiences and reviews of others.
Whether we are checking a restaurant review before making a reservation, scanning customer experiences before trying out a new hair salon, or weighing out reviews from previous guests of your next hotel stay – it is only natural to judge a place by its reviews.
And it doesn’t stop there! You can actually leave reviews of police stations on Google maps, so they are probably the most hilarious and interesting reviews you can read online.
So, if you are planning on making a pit stop at any one of these Garda stations (the police force of the Republic of Ireland) or PSNI stations in the north of our island, here are ten hilarious reviews to give you an idea of what you are in for.
10. Mountjoy Garda Station, Co. Dublin – “I will definitely be paying another visit soon”
This previous visitor to Mountjoy Garda Station in Dublin gushes about their experience at the station. They were very impressed by the service they received writing,
“My experience was very good only a five minute wait the handcuffs were comfortably behind my back, the van was nice it could do with some air freshener”
Continuing they said, “Check in was simple I got my room within five minutes of checking in before I went to my room they did a personal search which was quite nice the cell was nice and comfortable and room service was very good I highly recommend this accommodation I will definitely be paying another visit soon.”
9. Ballinagh Garda Station, Co. Cavan – “10/10 would get arrested again”
They say a good experience can leave an imprint on a person, which will last a lifetime. Clearly, this previous visitor to Ballinagh Garda Station in County Cavan is one of them.
8. Tallaght Garda Station, Co. Dublin – “Nahhh”
No matter what language you want to translate it into, the message is clear: Tallaght Garda Station gets a thumbs down.
7. Emly Garda Station, Co. Tipperary – “Had a great time”
This person is clearly one of those “always look on the bright side” sort of folk. This definitely makes for a hilarious Google review of a Garda Station in Ireland, though.
6. Anglesea Street Garda Station, Co. Cork – “Queue. Sunrise was nice though”
They say that no matter what, you should always find a silver lining, in every and any situation. Clearly, this visitor to Anglesea Street Garda Station got the memo.
5. Galway Garda Station, Co. Galway – “Will not be staying again”
This previous customer will not be staying again; we reckon this review will have a grave impact on this Garda station’s online booking.
They wrote, “Worst experience of my life. Bed was very hard, good was cold. Will not be staying again.”
4. Tralee Garda Station, Co. Kerry – “Will for sure be getting arrested again”
We think this previous visitor – brimming with positivity – to Tralee Garda Station would have been a positive addition to the Garda station all-round.
They wrote, “Very gentle on handcuffing, police car very roomy, will for sure be getting arrested again!”
3. Ennis Garda Station, Co. Clare – “All you could ask for after a busy day of criminal misbehaviour”
Here is another previous customer, full of Irish wit and positivity.
They wrote, “Comfy spacious cells. All you could ask for after a busy day of criminal misbehaviour.”
2. Strand Road Police, Co. Derry – “Avoid at all costs”
This hilarious Google review of a police station in Ireland has us laughing out loud. Needless to say, they won’t be a returning customer.
They wrote, “Beds extremely hard and food horrible. Received several unwanted wake up calls which management refused to cancel during my stay. Avoid at all costs”
1. Lurgan Police Station, Co. Armagh – “They are serving better food than any takeaway in Lurgan”
The top spot on our list of ten hilarious Google reviews of police stations around Ireland has got to go to this customer who spent a night in Lurgan Police Station. It is laced in sarcasm and we are loving every word of it. They wrote,
“I have been in quite few B&B in Northern Ireland but this place is quite different. From the start the room was not too comfortable and could not share it with friends (some internal rules), did not enjoy the view from the window and I felt locked down.”
They go on to recognise the great importance of a city-side location, especially in terms of public transport:
“Once my place was booked I could not leave the place as they want you to enjoy every minute. I quite enjoyed the location as it’s right in the middle of the town centre – very convenient for people that need the bus to get back home.”
Overall, it seems this previous guest enjoyed the service at Lurgan Police Station in Northern Ireland.
“The staff itself nice and warm people, always asked if I need anything and even accompanied me on the way to toilet. They are serving better food than any takeaway in Lurgan.”